If you are planning on buying Wal-Mart flip-flops, you should probably buy them now. Another week, and your size (not to mention preferred color and style) could very well be gone, not to be seen again until next March. How do I know this? I'm an expert because I worked in the shoe department of a Wal-Mart during the summer of 1999.

Jenny at Age 21: My First Post-College Job

If you lived anywhere near Somerset in 1999, you may have seen me. I was one of the blue-smocked ladies who unpacked the daily shipments of flip-flops and stocked the flip-flop display. I was one of the first people to know when Wal-Mart was completely out of flip-flop inventory that summer. (We stopped receiving flip-flop shipments around the Fourth of July.) I may have even explained to you or one of your relatives why your family would not be able to purchase flip-flops for your August beach vacation.

Cause, really, what gives Wal-Mart the right to run out of flip-flops in early July? Don't they know that people are still trying to summer-time footwear for their young kids? How rude, especially in light of the fact that Wal-Mart is the only real "department" store in a 30 mile radius. Man, even the closest Target is over an hour's drive away, and on the other side of a mountain, in Greensburg!

(Note: There's still no Target anywhere near Somerset. A few years ago, community activists and a college marketing professor asked Target to build a store 30 miles away, in Johnstown. Target declined.)

The only thing that I could do for these frustrated parents and grandparents was refer them to the Payless shoe store next door to us in the plaza. Hopefully they might have something.

One older woman came to our department one day with her grandson and asked my 18-year-old co-worker, "Do you have thongs for little boys?" My kind but daffy co-worker was extremely disturbed by this customer, until somebody explained to her that a thong can be used as a synonym for flip-flop.

I think that I lucked out in being assigned to the shoe department that summer. The women who ran the registers reported to us on the many customers who would try to use invalid coupons, and then get irate when the coupons were not accepted. One of the sales associates in the housewares section ended up on crutches and light duty for breaking her ankle after being rammed into with a customer's shopping cart.

I know that some of you are now thinking, "Jenny, why did you christen your brand-new degree with a job at Wal-Mart? Especially during the sunset of the Clinton years, when the country was wallowing in its own success?"

Well, if you have ever seen the musical Avenue Q or heard its soundtrack then you are familiar with the song, "What can you do with a B.A. in English?" Well . . . yeah. (You really should buy the soundtrack. You might even be able to find it at Wal-Mart.)

I didn't major in English, but I ended up becoming as marketable as one. Right now I'm not going to get into the whole cliched debate about whether certain majors (cough, cough, Communication Arts) are worthless. Maybe some evening after a Long Island Iced Tea or half of a beer I will blog more on that tangent.

It's all good, though. According to this Wikipedia entry, Sam Walton started his own retail career at J.C. Penney when he was 21-22 years old. Look at how great he became! Except, he stuck with retail while I wandered off to a career in commercial insurance. Thanks to the insurance industry, I haven't had to peddle Wal-Mart flip-flops since 1999.